What can you do in the aftermath of the Oklahoma tornado or even after the devastating hurricanes like Sandy or Katrina, or the horrendous fall out from the recent fires from the fertilizer blast in Waco, Texas?
There are three things that you can do immediately right now following the tornado or at anytime in the future when there are other nature related or man-made disasters.
First and foremost, you can be willing to feel your own feelings about the losses that the survivors face. Often, these types of disasters can help us be in touch with losses that we may have faced but never dealt with. If we are willing to look courageously at what the survivors face, it will often, if not always, bring us to a place of deep empathy because we can somehow relate because the distater reminds us of some loss.
Second, find at least one like minded person with whom you can converse with about how you are feeling. Make it a two-sided conversation in which you each take a turn speaking while the other listens. When you are the listener, all you need do is Listen with you heart wide open and your mouth completely closed in love. That is, when you are listener, you do not need to fix, recommend, advise or try to tell the other why they should not be feeling the way they do.
Third, take some tiny action to let those around you know that you love them. Make calls! Send Thank you notes! Begin to make amends with someone you are estranged from. Every relational healing begin with one person being willing to be vuleranble and take that first step toward reconciliation.
And now for 2 advanced steps:
1. If you have gotten in touch with some unhealed memories from a painful loss, take some action to begin the healing process. See a counselor, minister, trusted friend, etc.
2. The best book out there on healing the past is THE GRIEF RECOVERY HANDBOOK BY John James and Russell Friendman.
If you really like their book, call me for 50% off a grief counseling session.
and finally, if you are guided to do so, take some direct action to help the survivors of the current loss as well.
We can live our lives as if there is no end or we end our lives every day by living as if we are too afraid to be vulnerable.
Suzanne Carter, M.A., L.P.C.,
Unity Minister
Licensed Professional Counselor
Equine Assisted Psychotherapist
Certified Spiritual Intelligence Coach
Grief Specialist
the best of all: Mother to Christopher, Sunny, Jessie and Harmony
720-540-6738
www.UnityWholenessCenter.com
Be the One you have come here to be and you help heal the world by being yourself: It is YOUR only way!