WHAT IS THE BEST DEFENSE AGAINST THE BOOGEY MAN: YOUR TRUTH.
First, by boogey man, I mean anyone who acts as if they are better than you. I am talking about people who have learned to feel better about themselves by making others feel less than. I am talking about grandiose people.
In life, many people choose to be arrogant and grandiose or go “1-up” around others.
People use this little trick of going “1-up” because they are feeling “1-down”. Whereas “1-up” has to do with arrogance and grandiosity, “1-down” has to do with feeling less than others or in other words, feeling a sense of shame or that there is something wrong with them.
Feeling shame or having a belief that there is something wrong with oneself does not feel good. It feels horrible. So, humans have learned that a quick antidote to this is to find a way to feel “better than”. This is a quick and temporary fix and it does nothing to solve the problems that create these negative beliefs about oneself and others. Children learn these impotent techniques from their parents, their caretakers, aunts, uncles, teachers and virtually most of the adults that they must hang out with when these caretakers have not done enough inner work to know that we are all “equal to”.

Then these children are not taught to feel “equal to” all others. They are taught in big and small ways that “the big gun wins”. They are taught that the goal in life is to continually find others to make yourself feel “better than” rather than to discover your own self worth and to live life from this place of being one’s authentic self.
When one does choose to live their life from their authenticity, it is really quite easy to also accept that others have the right to do this as well. And, or however, when someone is behaving “1-up” or “1-down”, they are being inauthentic and this does not mean that we need to go “1-up” into judgment or “1-down” in to shame.

One’s authenticity is their own Truth. There is no truth with a capital “T” except when Truth pertains to one’s own Truth. In this case, Truth is defined as ones’ own feelings, thoughts, perceptions, history, dreams, desires, and hopes. We all have our own Truth. And when we choose to connect to our own Truth rather than try to change someone else’s truth, real Harmony can begin.

We can stay in the awareness that we are all “equal” and this actually does wonders for any one person or group going into grandiosity or shame.

I have been running into a lot of grandiose people lately. And, I have been able to stay connected to my Truth that I am no better or no worse than anyone else. I have been able to say No, when I want to say No, and Yes, when I want to say Yes. One example will explain how wonderful it is when we stay connected to our own Truth, set good boundaries and then speak from the “I” with love and respect. The example: I was signing up for an online class with someone who is quite famous. This person, however, is quite arrogant. I made a request and asked the famous person to respond, and not only did this person not respond but his organization seemed to have an “attitude” toward me. At first, I was ignoring this; just thinking I would still do the class. When a 3rd person had this “attitude” toward me, I finally decided to ask for a refund and I cannot tell you how wonderful this felt to me. I stayed true to myself, asked for the refund and I knew that I did the right thing.

Again, the truth is this : NO MATTER WHAT STATION IN LIFE ANYONE OCCUPIES, NO MATTER WHAT RACE OR GENDER THEY ARE, NO MATTER WHAT SOCIO-ECONOMIC STATUS ONE IS AT: WE ARE ALL EQUAL.

If we would be willing teach our children this right now, our world’s problems could be solved in 5 years. If we choose to believe this right now, our world views will change to believing that the challenges we face are problems that everyone must work together to solve.
And, if someone has more resources, or more awareness or more intelligence, then they will use their awareness and resources to take more responsibility to solve the problems. This may sound like “radical thinking” to some. It is not. It simply reflects the truth that the air I breathe, and the water I drink comes from the same place that the air you breathe and the water you drink and we must work together to make sure the supply for both of us stays healthy.